Store Signs

  • On Maternity Room door: “Push, Push, Push.”
  • At an Optometrist’s Office: “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”
  • At a Car Dealership: “The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”
  • Outside a Muffler Shop: “No appointment necessary. We’ll hear you coming.”
  • Outside a Hotel: “Help! We need inn-experienced people.”
  • At an Auto Body Shop: “May we have the next dents?”
  • In a Veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”
  • On a Music Teacher’s door: “Out Chopin.Bach in a minuet”
  • At the Electric Company: “We will be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don’t, you will be.”
  • On the side of a Garbage Truck: “We’ve got what it takes to take what you’ve got.”
  • On the door of a Computer Store: “Out for a quick byte.”
  • In a Restaurant window: “Don’t stand there and be hungry, come in and get fed up.”
  • Inside a Bowling Alley: “Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop.”
  • In the front yard of a Funeral Home: “Drive carefully, we’ll wait.”
  • On an Electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”
  • Outside a Radiator Repair Shop: “Best place in town to take a leak.”
  • In a Non-smoking area: “If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”

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